Lessons Learned Archives -

My Childhood Best Friend, Rebekah

Posted on By Joy

I just learned that my childhood best friend, Rebekah, has passed away. She leaves behind her mother, brother, and two teenaged children.

My heart is broken.

As I learned the news of her passing, my mind was flooded with the memories we made. There are so many memories and I treasure them all.

Like most childhood best friend relationships, Rebekah and I were inseparable during our elementary and middle school years. We spent countless weekends together which always involved junk food and staying up late. I remember us wearing matching outfits and spending hours teasing and spraying our hair before heading out to the skating rink or movie theater.

Before cell phones were invented, Rebekah and I kept our landline phones busy talking to each other almost every night. Isn’t it funny that all these years later, I still remember her phone number? We would talk for hours about school, boys, and our life dreams. Our friendship was special and I felt lucky to have Rebekah as my friend.

Do you know what else made my friendship with Rebekah special? We talked about our faith with each other.

Rebekah loved Jesus. I can remember us staying up until 3am talking the night way and it seemed our thoughts about God always entered our conversation. We did not have all of the answers to life’s biggest questions, but I knew she believed in Jesus and she knew I did too. She was a safe place for me when it came to the things of God.

Rebekah’s faith encouraged my faith.

Although we promised each other we would be best friends forever, like many childhood friendships, Rebekah and I began to drift apart in high school. She was gifted in drama and singing while I was busy with cheerleading and was discovering my love for science.

We found new friends who shared our new interests, and with each passing year, our connection with one another became less and less. When we graduated and went away to college, I lost contact with Rebekah. I thought about her often, but we never reconnected.

The news of Rebekah’s passing has broken my heart. Although we lost touch so long ago, she has always had a special place in my heart. She was such an important person in my life, and as I learned the news that her life had ended, I could not stop the tears from flowing.

Rebekah was my childhood best friend. She encouraged me to think deeply about the things of God. Rebekah’s presence in my life helped strengthen my faith.

As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.
~Proverbs 27:17

What about you? Did you have a special childhood friend you felt safe with to talk about the things of God? Was there someone who helped strengthen your faith?

What happened to that special friend in your life? Maybe they have already passed away from this life. Maybe you are still close with that friend even today, or maybe like my friendship with Rebekah, over the years you drifted apart.

If it is possible, I encourage you to find that special friend. Invite them to lunch. Laugh and reminisce about your childhood. Tell them what they meant to you all those years ago. Thank them for being someone who strengthened your faith. Don’t wait until it’s too late!

It brings me such sadness to know that Rebekah has lost her battle with cancer. I am so thankful for her presence in my life and the memories we made. I know she loved Jesus and I know I will see Rebekah again in heaven. I look forward to that day!

Grateful for you,
Joy

This is the Day I Almost Died

Posted on By Joy

Hello, November 20th! I am so happy to see you!

I bet you don’t know what day of the week Nov 20^th was on in 2005. Well, I do.

It was a Sunday. The Sunday before Thanksgiving. It was also almost my last day on earth.

It’s funny the things we don’t know. I am a pharmacist. I am a healthcare provider and I did not know that you could die from a stomach bug. Well, I’m here to tell you that you can. You can absolutely die from a stomach bug and I almost did.

On November 20, 2005, I was 31 years old. I had been married to my husband, Bryan for over eight years. We were living in our new home. Our daughter Ellie was three years old and our son Sam was nine months old. Our lives were full!

We went to church that morning, and then out to lunch with family. I did not feel 100% myself, but I had no idea what was coming.

When we got home from lunch, I felt unusually tired so I went to lie down. Bryan was watching a basketball game while Ellie played and Sam took a nap.

Early that afternoon, my symptoms started. It was a very bad stomach virus. I had not had a stomach bug since I was 16 years old. I guess it came to me with a vengeance, because it hit me fast and hard!

I was very sick for hours and I found myself completely lethargic, lying on the bathroom floor. I managed to pull myself up and look in the mirror. I looked gray and I was scared.

The TV was on in the den and I was in our master bathroom. Bryan had no idea how fast things had progressed or how seriously ill I was. I did not have the strength to call to him loud enough for him to hear me, so I crawled to my bed and thought I would just sleep it off. As I started to drift off, I felt God urge me not to sleep. About that time, Bryan came in to check on me.

He panicked when he saw me! I had never been this sick before. He called my Mom to come over and stay with the kids and we drove to the ER. At this point, I was very dizzy and things were blurry.

By the time we arrived to the hospital, by kidneys were shutting down. My pulse was around 170 beats per minute and my blood pressure was 65/39 (normal is 120/80). The doctors told Bryan to call the family. This was a serious situation we were in. They also told Bryan that if I would have tried to “sleep it off,” I would have died.

A whole team of folks came over to start working on me. Over the next few hours, they gave me EIGHT liters of fluid in order to make my kidneys start working again. I was given multiple antibiotics and was monitored very closely for the next few days. After several days in the hospital, my body began to improve, but I was not out of the woods yet.

Over the next six months, I struggled with more dehydration. I continued to have virus-like symptoms and was in and out of the ER getting bags of fluid. My resting heart rate was between 115-130 bpm (normal resting is around 70 bpm), so my heart was working like I was running a marathon at all times. This made me lose significant weight.

I weighed under 100 pounds even though I forced myself to eat. Everything went straight through me and I was a mess. I had no energy…none! I could not take care of my family. I was out of work and I wondered if I would ever get better.

I would lie in my bed or on the couch asking God what was He trying to teach me? I would be home alone throughout the day, and would say, “please let me learn whatever lesson I need to learn so I can get back to my life!”

I went through anxiety and bouts of depression like I had never experienced in the past. I wondered if God heard my cries. I wondered if this would be my new normal. I prayed and prayed, begging God to fix this, but my body would not get back to normal.

My primary care physician was perplexed with what was going on with me. I was so young. Why could I not get better? I saw every kind of specialist under the sun in hopes of finding an answer to this illness.

Although it took a full year for me to get back to having 90% of the energy I had before, life did get back to a more normal state. Slowly, my body recovered, but I was not the same person I was before November 20, 2005.

This time in my life was dark and uncertain, but do you know what happened through this experience? I gained a fresh appreciation for the little things in life. My marriage grew stronger and I learned that every single day is a blessing from God!

I grew closer to God through that experience like never before. I came to the end of my rope and I had a choice to make.

Do I believe God to be who He says He is, or not?

I decided to believe God and somehow, someway, He would work this illness for good.

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. ~Romans 8:28

So here we are again…It’s Nov 20th. It’s the week of Thanksgiving.

This is the season of Thankfulness. It is the season of Gratitude! I believe one of the keys to living a happy life is to have a grateful heart. Being grateful to God for who He is and all He has done for you, is the starting point.

You see, when your heart is set on being grateful, there’s no room for complaining. When your heart is set on being grateful, there is no room for bitterness. When your heart is set on being grateful, there is no room for unforgiveness.

Sure—life is hard. Sometimes it is really hard! People let you down. Sickness comes. Dreams are broken. Money is uncertain. If we look hard enough, we can always find something to complain about.

But you know what else? When we look hard enough, we can always find something to be grateful for, too. Why don’t we choose to focus on that, instead?

So, hello to you November 20^th, 2018! I am so grateful to see you!

Happy Thanksgiving, friends!

-Joy

Wake-Up Christian Mamas!

Posted on By Joy

A friend of mine brought to my attention a video game that her 12-year-old son is begging for. Most of his friends already have this game. It is called Grand Theft Auto V, otherwise known as GTA.

Now maybe I’m coming in late to this party, but I had never heard of this game.

My friend told me she was going to order it on Amazon for her son’s birthday gift and wanted to know if I knew anything about it. She said it was very popular among middle-school boys and since I have a middle-school-aged son, I decided to educate myself about this GTA game.

My goodness! I was not ready for what I found out!

Here are the facts:

Versions are rated M for maturity (17+) or R
There are explicit sexual scenes throughout the game and sex is a part of the main story line or “campaign”
There is a strip club mini-game where you can “touch” breasts and save provocative panties
You can watch a man and woman having sex
Players can be required to take video footage of celebrities having sex
Players can participate in many sexual activities at ANY time
Bloody/gory/murderous violence is throughout this game
Players can shoot police officers and innocent people
Torturous scenes include beating a helpless man
Animals (including pets) can be killed at will
Players play the role of criminal characters
Players can randomly kill anyone in the game

This list goes on and on.

Do you want to know the most shocking part of this review? This game earned $800 million in its first day of sales and $1 billion in its first three days. It is one of the most popular games of all time.

Wake-up Christian Mamas!

My friend is a Christian. She loves her husband and her kids deeply. She takes them to church and serves The Lord fiercely.

She and I were in a casual conversation about how hard it is to buy a birthday gift for your 13-year-old son. We were just chatting about ideas over lunch when this came up. She said all of his friends played this GTA game and he wanted it too, so she was thinking about getting it for him.

STOP THE BUS!!!!!

My point with this post is that you and I need to wake-up and get involved in what our kids are doing behind closed doors. We cannot just willy-nilly buy any video game or App for our sons (or daughters) without doing a thorough Mama-Bear investigation.

The images in these video games will be engrained in the minds of our sons for their life-time. These games are evil and these boys will have long-term negative effects from filling their minds with these images.

Today’s video games are not like our video games back in the days of the Atari. This is not your standard Pac-Man or Donkey Kong type of game. Games like GTA are full of sex, violence, murder and more.

There is also an option with these games to connect to wifi so you can play with your friends. Kids gang up together in the storyline and engage in these activities together.

They talk about it at the lunch table at school. They brag about how many people they killed while playing the game and how many sexual acts were performed.

Evil! Pure evil!

Most of us would never knowingly allow this type of garbage into our homes. The problem is that we are often uninformed. We assume the game is safe because other kids are playing it. We are also not informed about the ratings of these games. We may not even know what “M” stands for.

Life is busy and time gets away from us….well this is a wake-up call to me that I need to be doing my homework!

Uninformed parents are in their living rooms watching “Fixer Upper,” while their sons are upstairs in their rooms watching people have sex on a video game that their parents ordered on Amazon for their birthday.

It happens every day.

It could happen to me. It could happen to you.

This is a call to all Christian Mamas! We need to be nosy! We need to be educated! We need to be involved!

Sift through your son’s video games. Review every phone App thoroughly. Be aware that kids can even hide games similar to GTA on their electronic devices. Read more about that here: http://abc13.com/technology/discreet-apps-help-teens-hide-things-from-parents/998592/

What can we do?

Pray for our kids and with our kids
Help our kids know God’s Word and what He desires from us
Talk to our kids about the dangers in these games
Be very frank with our kids about sex, shootings and crime
Talk to the parents of our kids’ friends and make a stand together
Be nosy
Ask questions
Set standards
Say, “no”

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy…and He is after your son and mine.

~ Mama Bear Joy

You are not called to trust everyone…

Posted on By Joy

This has been weighing on my heart all day and I have felt God urging me to write to you. I just know someone needs this word of encouragement tonight.

I want to remind you my friend, that there are people in your life who want you to fail.

There are people who want you to quit chasing after God. They want you to stop pursuing the calling God has placed into your heart.

There are people in your life who do not want the best for you. In fact, they want the opposite.

How you respond to these people, matters.

God requires His children to do things outside of their comfort zones. Living for Jesus is not the easy road. It is the narrow road. It is also the best road.

When you examine God’s Word, you see God using the most unlikely people to do the most extraordinary things for His Kingdom. They did not do these amazing things because they were unusually gifted or talented, but because they trusted, and obeyed God.

They walked by faith, not by what they saw in front of them. They believed God and they, too, had opposition facing them each step of the way.

My friend, you have a decision to make each day. Who’s voice are you going to listen to?

Are you going to listen to those people who tell you that you cannot do what God is calling you to do? Are you going to listen to the people who question your motives and call you a fool?

People may tell you, “it’s not possible,” or “you can never do that.”

Do not listen to them.

Instead, make the daily decision to stay focused on Jesus. Stay connected to Him through prayer and reading your Bible. Cling to Him and keep running your race with courage and perseverance.

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.
~Proverbs 4:23

Guard your heart as you take each step of faith and BELIEVE that God will do what He says He will do!

The one who calls you is faithful, and he will do it.
~1 Thessalonians 5:24

YOU have a important race to run! YOU have an incredible life to live! Do not miss out on what God has planned for you. Listen to the voice of God and go full steam ahead!

Remember, we are called to love everyone. We are not called to trust everyone. May God give us the wisdom to know the difference.

Grateful for you,
~ Joy

The night I knocked out my front teeth…

Posted on By Joy

When I was 11, I had a crush on a boy that lived nearby. Let’s just call him, Greg.

Greg was three years older than me and when you’re an 11-year-old girl, a 14-year-old boy seems like the coolest person on the planet. I thought he was a super cute but he had never even noticed me.

One summer evening, my Mom and I were coming home from my piano lesson. It was getting dark and had rained earlier that day. When we pulled into the driveway, I could not believe my eyes! Greg was standing in my backyard!

Lucky me!

My Dad and Greg’s Dad were friends. That evening, Greg and his Dad had stopped by to talk to my Dad about some farm equipment.

An important part of this story comes from the fact that I grew up on a farm where I spent most of my days outside. I had a rectangle-shaped trampoline in my back yard that I jumped on a lot and I was pretty good at doing flips.

You need to remember that this was back in the ‘80s when there was no such thing as a NET around a trampoline nor was there padding around the metal frame.

No sir! That is not the way we did things back then. Safety was not really that important.

Us ’80’s kids just got on that rectangle springy device and jumped and flipped and laughed. Sometimes, we would fall off and smack ourselves right onto the ground. No worries, though. In our perseverance, we would get right back up and go at it again. It’s a wonder any of us survived the ‘80s!

Well, on this particular evening, when I saw Greg in my back yard, I quickly devised a plan.

As soon as my Mom parked the car, I told her that I needed to go talk to Daddy. I ran out to where they were standing, and in an effort to try to impress Greg, I said with confidence in my voice, “Hey—I can do flips on that trampoline over there. Want to see?”

He said, “ok”, so off we went. I got on the trampoline with complete self-assurance!

This was my chance!

As Greg stood on the ground in front of me, I started jumping. I put everything I had into that moment and jumped higher than ever. I wanted it to be the best flip I had ever done. When I felt the moment was right, I gave it all I had and I did my flip.

I flipped so fast and strong that I over-flipped. My toes hit the damp trampoline mat and I lost control. My body flung forward right towards Greg. I let out a loud scream as my face fell towards the edge of the trampoline. My mouth hit the large green metal post that held the springs in place as my body did another flip over that bar. I landed flat on my back right where Greg was standing.

This was not the magical moment I had envisioned.

There I was, lying flat on the ground with Greg looking down on me. “Are you ok?” he asked with nervousness in his voice.

I was shocked, embarrassed and mortified about what just happened. I tried to salvage my pride by jumping up to my feet. I knew by the pain I felt in my mouth that something bad had happened to my teeth.

It was dark, so I could not tell if I was bleeding or not, so I got real close to Greg’s face, opened my mouth and said, “Is it bleeding?”

He did not answer me, but instead, just looked at me in horror. In a panic, I asked again, only this time, louder, “I said is it bleeding?” He looked at me like I was some kind of monster and said, “you might want to go inside.” I ran inside and looked in the mirror. It was a bad sight.

My two permanent front teeth were hanging by their roots and blood was everywhere.

Needless to say, the hope I had for Greg to fall in love with me that evening went right down the drain as I headed with my Mom and Dad for an emergency dental visit. Thankfully, and miraculously, the dentist was able to save my teeth.

My whole point of running out to see Greg that evening was because I liked him and I wanted to prove to him that he should like me too. I wanted to impress him with my skills and I wanted him to notice me.

My actions were driven by my pride.

God teaches us in His Word that we are to be humble, not prideful. We are to position ourselves rightly before Him and others. It is not a prideful spirit that brings honor, but instead, it is a humble spirit that obtains it! (Proverbs 29:23).

Plain and simple. God hates pride.

To fear the LORD is to hate evil; I hate pride and arrogance, evil behavior and perverse speech. ~Proverbs 8:13

In almost every example of pride that we see in the Bible there is a link to failure, not success. God resists those who are prideful, but he gives favor to those who are humble. (Proverbs 3:34)

My friend, don’t let your pride prevent you from living the life God intends for you to live. Humble yourself before Him. Humble yourself before others. Consider their needs above your own. Forgive quickly. Love deeply and serve Jesus wholeheartedly. Do not be motivated by impressing people. Be motivated by the love and humility of Jesus.

That night back in 1985, I think I lived out Proverbs 16:18 which says: “Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.” I learned a big lesson through that experience. Today, I am no longer doing flips on trampolines and I am keeping Micah 6:8 close to my heart. “He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.”

Grateful for you!

~Joy

When God Speaks at Wal-Mart

Posted on By Joy

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.

~Philippians 2:3-4

Did you catch how clear these verses are? Do NOTHING out of selfish ambition. Whew! Now that convicts me!

I think most of us want to be patient and self-less people and in theory, we know these are attributes of followers of Christ. This is not news to us, but I wonder if you, like me, ever struggle with actually living it out in your daily life?

Too many times I look out for my own personal interests instead of the interests of others. It is as if MY time is more valuable than someone else’s time.

The other day, I stopped by Wal-Mart on my way home from work, just to pick up a few items. I only needed THREE things. Of course it was a Monday and of course it was getting close to 5:00 pm. Looking back, I realize maybe this was not the best idea I had ever had, but regardless of my lack of judgment, there I was.

I was making great time zipping through the aisles UNTIL I went to checkout. I made a quick pass through and examined the checkout lines. The self-checkout line seemed to be a mile long. I noticed a lady wearing strappy red shoes at the end of that line and I felt sorry for her. I quickly went to find a faster, full-service line.

As I quickly pushed my buggy along the aisles, I found a checkout line with only one buggy in it!

SCORE!!!

I jumped in behind a young lady and her toddler and waited. This lady’s buggy was full, but I felt sure it would go fast.

As I waited, I watched as the young lady in front of me was having trouble with her toddler misbehaving. The toddler was picking up items and dropping them one by one. I found myself getting irritated because it was slowing down the checkout process, but I remained positive and still felt sorry for the lady with the red strappy shoes in the one-mile self-checkout line.

As the young lady’s last items were scanned, I felt happiness in my heart until the young lady dug around in her purse and whipped out a stack of coupons.

I resisted from letting out a loud sigh of despair, but I could not hold back the look of disappointment that came to my face.

“Oh no,” I thought. “Maybe the self-checkout line would have been quicker.”

The cashier started scanning each coupon and of course some of the coupons did not work. Some were out of date. Some were for products the young lady did not even purchase. Some had restrictions on them. One by one the coupons were scanned and I was relieved when the last one beeped with success.

Just as I thought it was almost my turn, the young lady scanned her credit card and wouldn’t you know it? It would not work. The cashier did not know what to do and said, “There must be a problem with the machine.”

INSERT MY FRUSTRATION!

After trying several times to get the card processed, the cashier had to call for the manager to come over and help.

As I looked up, the lady with the red strappy shoes (who was in the mile-long self check-out line) was exiting Wal-Mart with her paid items. I mumbled under my breath and made a mental note to always choose the self-checkout line.

It was too late for me to change lines now. I was stuck. It had been a long day and I was busting at the seams to get home. I was frustrated. I was tired. I just wanted to leave Wal-Mart.

It was then that I felt God’s Spirit speak to me.

Through my frustration and impatience, God reminded me of those verses in Philippians about valuing others more than myself.

My heart began to soften and my frustration faded.

As I watched the young lady struggle with her toddler, God reminded me about how hard life is. He brought to my mind how difficult it was for me to complete a Wal-Mart shopping trip when my children were toddlers, and how being a Mom is one of the hardest jobs in the world.

As I watched the cashier desperately try to process the young lady’s credit card, God reminded me of my first cashier job in college. I, too, felt insecure when something went wrong with the credit card machine. I thought back to the time I meant to charge a customer $15.00 but instead, I charged them $150.00. I was so nervous as I called my manager over to help me correct my mistake.

Right there in the checkout line at Wal-Mart, God convicted me about my attitude and He reminded me of the importance of showing compassion, patience and kindness.

When I finally did get to checkout with my three items, the sweet cashier told me it had been a hard day for her and that she was sorry it took so long. She also told me she was new as a cashier and was still learning. I smiled and said, “It’s no problem. I’ve been there too.”

I believe one of the biggest “proofs” of our faith is how we treat other people. When we get frustrated, complain or mumble, we do not please God. What pleases Him is when we use kindness and patience with others. He is pleased when we put someone else’s needs above our own.

The truth is, I had a bad attitude and was in too big of a hurry that day in Wal-Mart. I am grateful the God of the Universe spoke to me and reminded me of His Truth.

The next time you find yourself in a situation where your patience is running thin, I hope you think about these verses in Philippians. I hope your heart softens and you show the love of Christ in that situation….even if you’re in the middle of Wal-Mart!

~Joy

Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.
~Colossians 3:12

Make a Memory!

Posted on By Joy

Fall is in the air and it thrills my soul! It is my favorite time of year as I love the cooler temperatures, the colorful trees, and the smell of pumpkin spice.

This is the time of year when I pull out my crockpot and make chili beans, vegetable soup, homemade chicken and noodles and all of those warm, “feel good” one-pot meals.

I sip hot chocolate (with lots of marshmallows), wear wool socks, thick sweaters and boots! OH yes—fall is the most wonderful time of the year, for me.

Some of my most favorite memories are centered around the fall season. Memories of family get-togethers, camping trips, pumpkin patches and snuggling on the couch with those I love on a cool October morning.

What about you?

What comes to your mind when you think about the fall season?

I worked at Union University (in Jackson, TN) for three years and my Dean, Dr. Sheila Mitchell, would make a statement from time to time. We would be talking about an upcoming conference or a family vacation and she would say “while you’re there, make a memory.”

Dean Mitchell is one of those people who lives her life to the fullest! She has wisdom to know that life is precious and the moments we have are gifts from God. She is quick to tell you that there is always something to be grateful for and that life is too short to be miserable.

Why focus on what’s wrong with your life when you can have a heart of thankfulness and focus on what is right with your life?

Dean Mitchell lives with purpose. Not only does she live her life to please God, but she also lives her life to serve others. She plans creative way to make special moments with her family, friends and those around her. It might be an evening boat ride on the lake with her husband, or a special tea party with her granddaughter.

She knows how to love other people well and she works hard at making special moments with them. When those special moments come, Dean Mitchell fully embraces the moment. She doesn’t just let it slip away unnoticed. She soaks in all in and takes a snapshot in her mind that she tucks away as a treasured memory.

You and I have a role to play in making our life count.

God created you and me for a reason. He has kingdom work for us to do and He has good things in store for us!

It is easy for us to feel weighed down with the many responsibilities we have.

We need to clean our house, do the laundry, pay the bills, go to work and the list goes on. But, we also need to invest in our marriages, plan special outings with our children, show love to a friend in need, serve someone in need and take time to soak in the beauty of God’s creation.

There is much more to life than just the work we need to do.

Be determined this fall season to make special memories.

It is serving others that brings about the most joy so do your part to create special moments with your family, friends and those around you.

This fall season, start a new family tradition. Take your kids on a fun adventure. Serve at a local ministry. Plan a weekend getaway with your husband.

Put energy and time into planning something special as you love those around you.

As your special moments unfold, I hope you will stop and thank God for His goodness. I hope you will stop and soak it all in. I hope you will stop, take a snapshot in your mind of all God has done and “make a memory” that will last a lifetime.

So glad you stopped by!

~Joy

I will give thanks to the Lord because of his righteousness; I will sing the praises of the name of the Lord Most High. ~Psalm 7:17

That was a BIG mistake!

Posted on By Joy

To say this past spring was stressful, would be an understatement! For our family, it was one of those taxing seasons of life where we had several major life stressors hit us all at once. It felt like my life was caught up in a demanding whirlwind and although I tried to hold things together, I was not sure how I would get through it all.

Have you ever been there?

Have you ever been at your breaking point with everything going on in your life? Have you ever thought you might not survive it?

During this stressful season of life, I worked late one Friday night and picked up a chicken sandwich on the way to Ellie’s soccer game. This restaurant has THE BEST BBQ sauce, so I asked for a side of it to put on my sandwich.

Yeah, that was a BIG mistake!

When I got to the field, the game had just started. I was super hungry and could hardly wait to enjoy my delicious chicken sandwich! I sat down, unwrapped my sandwich and opened the container of BBQ sauce. At that exact moment, out of nowhere, a soccer ball came flying off the field. It must have been traveling at lightning speed as it headed straight for me.

The soccer ball hit the BBQ sauce container and then it hit me upside the head, sending sticky gooey BBQ sauce all over me! To make things even more entertaining for all those standing nearby, I was wearing a white shirt!

It was not a pretty sight!

I was covered in BBQ sauce. It was in my hair, on my neck, dripping down my arms and all over my white shirt! To make things even more fabulous, there are no bathrooms at this soccer field, only a couple of porta potties each with their own hand sanitizer dispenser inside.

Are you kidding me?? Hand sanitizer is useless when it comes to cleaning up BBQ sauce!

So, as the BBQ sauce is dripping down my body, There are no paper towels anywhere in sight and NO RUNNING WATER!

It…was….totally ….awesome (insert sarcasm)!

Normally if this kind of thing happens to me, I can laugh it off and roll with the punches. Not this time.

Remember, this happened at a time when I was already mentally and emotionally drained. I did not have a positive, “can-do” attitude. Instead, I was feeling very low and overwhelmed with life.

Being hit in the head with a soccer ball and bathed with BBQ sauce did not improve my emotional stability!

I really don’t know how, but I managed to hold it together through the BBQ sauce immersion. People around me tried to hide their laughter because they felt so sorry for me. I remained calm but if you could have peered into my soul, you would have seen that I desperately wanted to cry.

Sticky and gooey, I watched the game, but near the end of the game, it started pouring rain like something I would imagine happened during the days of Noah and the flood. We quickly packed up our chairs and ran as fast as we could to the car, but by the time we got there, we were drenched!

I looked like something out of a horror movie. The rain caused my black mascara to run down my face, there was mud all over my legs from running in the rain and don’t forget that my white shirt was stained with dark red BBQ sauce.

It was not one of my finer moments.

We made it home safely in the torrential rainstorm and when I walked in the door, I could not hold it together any longer.

I fell completely apart.

I found a place to be alone and I cried like a baby. At that moment, for me, life felt too hard. It was too much. I felt like I was going to break!

It has been a couple of months since the BBQ sauce incident and do you know what happened?

I did not break. Instead, I survived.

Eventually, the stressors of that season of life settled down and life slipped back on track.

As I write to you tonight, I want to share with you a few things God reminded me of as I think back to this spring:

First: Life is stressful and there will be seasons of life that make you feel overwhelmed. Feeling overwhelmed does not make you a bad Christian. It does not mean your faith is weak. It means you’re human.

When those tough seasons come, you and I need to run towards God, not away from Him. We need to remind ourselves of who HE is, soak up His Word and stand firm on His promises. He is always with us. He will strengthen us! He will never leave us!

“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

~Isaiah 41:10

Second: When life feels too hard, it’s ok to cry. Throughout God’s Word, Godly people cried out, expressing their emotions of sadness and despair. Faithful men like King David who poured out his heart to God when life was hard. Blameless men like Job who grieved and mourned over his life’s tragedy. Even our Lord Jesus who, in the Garden of Gethsemane, cried out to the Father as He felt overwhelming sadness and anguish.

My friend, you and I both know that life is not always rainbows and sunshine. Life is hard and sometimes it feels overwhelmingly hard, but our God is good all the time! God wants us to lean on Him and trust Him at all times (and that includes the hard times).

“Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.”

~Psalm 62:8

Third: Never EVER bring a side of BBQ sauce to a soccer game, especially if you plan to sit near the field. Take it from me; just eat before the game.

Grateful for you!

-Joy

It will be the best you’ve ever had!

Posted on By Joy

Ocean Isle Beach (OIB) is a quiet, family beach community where folks drive their golf carts on the roads and where life seems to slow down a bit. It’s a small quaint place that Bryan and I enjoyed taking our children to when they were younger.

OIB is home to one of the sweetest ice cream shops around that serves the most delicious homemade strawberry ice cream. I mean to tell you, it is yummmmmmy!

Years ago, my cousin Adam, and his family, vacationed with us at OIB for a week of fun and sun! As we prepared for our trip down to the coast, I told Adam and Candace about the things we could do at OIB. Of course, I mentioned this fabulous ice cream shop and the delicious strawberry ice cream. I remember telling Adam it would be the best strawberry ice cream he had ever had!

Sure enough, while on our trip, we made our way to the ice cream shop and out of all the flavors available, Adam chose strawberry. Smart choice!

I just knew he would love it as much as I did, so I paid attention as he took his first bite. His expression was not as joyful as I had hoped it would be. I wanted him to tell me how fabulous this strawberry ice cream was, but instead, he just told me it was good. (Insert shock!)

GOOD? What did he mean, good? It is fantastic!

Here we are—back in 2009!

Adam and I have laughed about this strawberry ice cream story many times since that OIB trip. When we talk about it, he jokingly says, “Joy, you over-promised and under-delivered.”

What about you? Have you ever over-promised and under-delivered?

Maybe it wasn’t about how wonderful a flavor of ice cream was, but maybe you told someone you were going to do something and then you did not do it. Maybe you told a friend you would be somewhere and something came up so you were unable to go. Maybe a coworker asked you to pray for them and you said you would, but then you forgot.

Maybe like me you have had good intentions and you really wanted to stick to a commitment that you made, but life got in the way and you backed out of your commitment, letting someone else down.

From time to time, we break promises. We don’t follow through. We are not true to our word.

We over-promise and under-deliver.

It happens to us all.

Lately, God has been reminding me of how important it is for me to do what I say I am going to do! He has been reminding me that I should be careful not to overcommit myself to things I do not plan to stick to!

He has been reminding me that I should be a person of my word and that my integrity is vital to my walk with Him.

Talk is cheap! Living out my faith takes action!

Jesus emphasizes this point through the parable of two sons:

“What do you think? There was a man who had two sons. He went to the first and said, ‘Son, go and work today in the vineyard.’ “’I will not,’ he answered, but later he changed his mind and went. “Then the father went to the other son and said the same thing. He answered, ‘I will, sir,’ but he did not go. “Which of the two did what his father wanted?” “The first,” they answered. ~Matthew 21:31a

The first son did not agree to go work, but he changed his mind later (another version says he repented), and he went to work. The second son said he would go to work, but then he did not go.

Which son pleased the father?

When you and I fail to keep our word, it affects our trustworthiness. It causes people to lose respect for us.

It also affects our friendships. Friendships are typically based on trust and it’s almost impossible to trust someone who does not keep their word.

My friend, you and I need to be people who are trustworthy. We carry the name of Christ. We are to be like Him!

People should be able to count on us! When we say we are going to do something, we should not need five reminders to do it! If we say we are going to do it, then we need to do it!

You and I are human and of course none of us are perfect, but that does not give us an excuse to repeatedly not follow through on our commitments.

God’s Word is clear that our words matter! We are accountable for our words—all of them!

“But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment for every empty word they have spoken.” ~Matthew 12:26

Let’s be ever-more cautious to be a person of our word. When we make a commitment to do something, let’s be determined to stick to it!

Well, I know you have a craving for a delicious scoop (or two) of strawberry ice cream! If you get the chance, make the drive down to Ocean Isle Beach and enjoy some at the local ice cream shop! Regardless of what my cousin Adam thinks, there’s a good chance it will be the best strawberry ice cream you’ve ever had! 🙂

Thanks for stopping by!

~Joy

For more about keeping your word, check out this link: https://www.openbible.info/topics/keeping_your_word

I hope God never asks me to do that!

Posted on By Joy

FEAR! I’m pretty sure we all struggle with it from time to time. We are fearful of many things: public speaking, being diagnosed with a terminal illness, losing a loved one, financial hardship, spiders, snakes, and the list goes on.

What about you? What are you afraid of?

I wonder if in your walk with God, you also have fears. I wonder if you ever feel afraid that God may call you to do something you do not want to do.

How would you complete this sentence?

I hope God never asks me to do ___________________ because I’m not sure I would do it.

Fear is a normal emotion. We all feel afraid from time to time. Some fear is good and some fear is bad.

There is a healthy fear that prevents us from jumping off a 10 story building, or driving 90 miles an hour down the highway. This type of fear can help us make wise decisions about things that may cause us harm, but not all fear is good.

There is also a paralyzing fear that can prevent us from taking steps of faith. The Bible refers to this type of fear as “living with a spirit of fear.” Living with a spirit of fear means we are too afraid to do what God is leading us to do. Living with a spirit of fear discounts the Holy Spirit’s power, and it diminishes our boldness of faith! This type of fear does not come from God!

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.” – 2 Timothy 1:7

Today, my friend, I want to remind you that Satan is the father of lies and he will use fear to place you and me in a state of bondage. He wants us to doubt God and he wants fear to drive us to being an ineffective Christian. Satan will use fear to deceive you!

You are of your father the devil, and your will is to do your father’s desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, and has nothing to do with the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks out of his own character, for he is a liar and the father of lies. -John 8:44

When you feel God urging you to do something, and you begin to feel afraid, I want you to remember God’s Truth. I want you to remember that if you are a child of God, then you have the power of the Holy Spirit living inside of you! The Holy Spirit’s power raised Jesus from the dead (Romans 8:11) and that same power lives inside of those who are saved through Jesus Christ!

You and I are called to be people of COURAGE! Over and over again in God’s Word, He tells His children to be STRONG AND COURAGEOUS!

Think about that! You are called to be COURAGEOUS, not a coward!

When you feel afraid of what you believe God is calling you to do, remind yourself that you serve a God that desires to be known! (Jeremiah 9:23-24, John 17:3)

He loves you and He wants an intimate relationship with you! (John 1:10-13, John 15:5, Jeremiah 31:3, John 3:16)

As you spend time with God, alone, in prayer and through reading your Bible, He WILL speak to you. (John 10:27)

As you listen for His voice, He will direct you on what He is calling you to do.

It is your job to respond to God’s call. You have only two choices….obey or disobey. Often, it’s then that the enemy jumps in to bring fear to your soul.

When a spirit of fear hovers over you, you need to respond with courage! First, acknowledge that this fear is not from God. Next, go to your knees in prayer and open the Word of God for clarification on how God is leading you. Last, trust God by taking the next step of faith. (Psalm 62:8,Nahum 1:7, Proverbs 30:5)

Remember that blank you filled in at the beginning of this post?

I hope God never asks me to do ___________________ because I’m not sure I would do it.

What if God asks you to do that very thing?

Will you trust Him and have courage to take the next step of faith, or will you live in a spirit of fear?

When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. In God, whose word I praise—in God I trust and am not afraid. What can mere mortals do to me? Psalm 56:3-4

Let us stand firm on God’s Truth! Let us be strong and courageous!

Let our faith always be bigger than our fear!

Grateful for you!

-Joy

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